Iain "Jonah" Balshaw

Today's reading comes from the Second book of Kings

And they said every one to his fellow, Come, and let us cast lots, that we may know for whose cause this evil is upon us. So they cast lots, and the lot fell upon Jonah Balshaw.

When the sailors discovered that it was Jonah Balshaw who was the reason for their dilemma, they immediately bombarded him with questions. Then said they unto him, Tell us, we pray thee, for whose cause this evil is upon us; What is thine occupation? and whence comest thou? what is thy country? and of what people art thou?

And I said unto them, I am an Lancashireman residing in Gloucestershire, and I fear the high ball, the up and under, the pass. I fear the coach, which hath maketh me the luckiest bastard ever to wear the England shirt despite my repeated failures at international level.

Here endeth the lesson.

With thanks to Rev Chris Gallagher....