Friday, 29 July 2011

Dumbass of the week

The US have caught a soldier trying to pull off another Fort Hood massacre. Given conscientious objector status because he’s a Moslem you would think he’s got little reason to go AWOL – he’s not going to be sent anywhere hot, dangerous or uncomfortable any time soon. Problem is he got caught as a connoisseur of Kiddie Porn – that was found on his Government issue Laptop. As a result he legged it. Rather than taking the well trodden nonce path of getting on the first plane to Cambodia he decided that he wanted to blow up some of his work mates instead.

“Abdo's Facebook page, which has since been taken down, showed that he traveled to New York City in September to attend an antiwar vigil and show support for Pfc. Bradley Manning, the alleged source for the classified war documents released by controversial group WikiLeaks”. One fuck up cheering on another one. Did none of his Platoon mates see his facebook page? Did none of them notice that a soldier attending rallies for a traitor isn’t the usual behaviour of a loyal and honourable part of the team?

And the pearl of this guys intelligence, he goes to the same gun store where the previous Fort Hood murderer – Major Hasan – picked up his weaponry. Rather unsurprisingly “Once Bitten, Twice Shy”, the owner of the store has trained his staff to take a keener interest in his customers. But lets be honest, he didn’t exactly have his work cut out for him. The PFC in question didn’t know what he was buying and asked “numerous questions” about the gunpowder in his shopping cart with the store clerk.

A soldier not knowing what to buy in a Gun store. That’s like Heston Blumenthal wondering dazed and confused round Tesco’s pointing at fruit and vegetables saying “What’s that then?” PFC Abdo wondering round the store muttering "Errr I want some of those bullet thingies, do they come in different sizes? Does this Black stuff with No Naked Flames on the lid go Bang?". Not only should some security heads roll on the back of this, but also the Army training team that managed to put him through his basic training without teaching him fairly vital military skills such as what does and does not go “bang”.

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